5/13/2011

So I quit writing here because i wrote some things that I don't want to own in public and turned to writing only on my machine and posting there and then after my sister's death 4/29/2011 I am wanting to write in public which is a joke as if I have a public. Still there is something about writing here that is public like having company and right now I want company.
These are troubled days for me. Buffy "came down"with a small cell carcinoma and was gone in nine months-4/29/2011 a week after she turned 63 in that hated month of childhood when we were the same age until my birthday 5/25. She underwent a long and rigorous chemo treatment and yet she went so fast. One thing lung cancer and melanoma are relatively merciful in that one goes fast and there is little pain, relatively,
The doctors said that she had tumors on the liver and the thyroid and something caused her to lose her sight and she just sunk deeply into the end.
Another day laying on the bed listening to MSNBC the same stories told by everyone all day long and the only difference is the type delivery according to the persona of the word giver. My reaction today is 1)Ron Paul is a liar ignoring problems saying well that will go away if people are free!". What a LYING,DECEIVING OLD MAN. And 2)The CIA is lying regarding Bin Laden and pornography-they have done this so many times to different people when believing that any positive regard for the person must be assassinated as well.
I am moping the kitchen floor-FINALLY!!! I want a quiet life with some order and consistency and quiet. I want to live with Steve and the cats and read and recover my heqlth and strength.