Caitlin Matthews who in her photo appears, to me, to be standing in the middle of the 19th century in Ireland in a thatched roof cottage has a wonderful essay on the Heirophant. She brings all the beauty of the culture captured in tradition and shared so that we have and understand our own values and loves. She correctly explains that the idea of the Heirophant as an old stick in the mud such as, to me,the current RC Pope who hilariously from his golden threads and elegant oils and immaculately clean rooms announces that the wealth of Creation is unfairly divided. fact is that humans believe that the gods show favor by allotting wealth to the lucky one.
I plan to order her book.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
December 27.2011
"In Jungian terms, the astrological evidence suggests that the collective unconscious is ultimately embedded in the macrocosm itself, with the planetary motions a synchronistic reflection of the unfolding archetypal dynamics of human experience.
"In Platonic terms, astrology affirms the existence of an anima mundi informing the cosmos, a world soul in which the human psyche participates as a microcosm of the whole."
-- Richard Tarnas
Cosmos and Psyche
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"If the study of astrology and its deeper meanings can provide anything, it is a real confidence in one's authentic self, thus encouraging the ability to relax into an acceptance of one's true nature."
-- Stephen Arroyo
Person-to-Person Astrology
Well Neptune Cafe is jumping and mentions the upcoming 5/20/2012 eclipse -I was born just after such an eclipse which one can see by my Sun conjunct the Moon's N Node-I wonder what this one is bringing. Of course I am reminded of Tom Sawyer's creator who was born when a comet was transiting and who died when the comet returned. I am full of the creepies these days struggling to come to grips with the death that has so impacted me and left me feeling stranded in the cosmos since my sister departed 4/29/2011 and left me standing alone,all the family gone before me-well the children are still here although my beautiful, creative Lisa and her daughter Krystil are gone now.
I have passed through the darkest moments that came, I believe, because I just don't like death nor thoughts of death nor evidence of the shortness of our time in the sun. I feel like I have come to a point of acceptance but even this causes me to wonder if I am not simply shrugging off the brutal fact of death and I am simply agreeing to let myself die. Time will tell.
I can no longer believe in the kind fairy tales of the Christianity I was born to-I don't see death as a going home to Heaven although I do believe that life is eternal but I am pretty sure that there is no way out ego,our id,etc go on. No I assume that G-d is something that we can not comprehend and that G-d is eternal without beginning or end-G-d is not created and so can never die, never end. This thought is sorrowful too at least to my ego.
I would I suppose have stayed in church but I always felt rejected there and not needed and so I have gone on tasting every non-lethal sin I could while reading my elders and exploring ideas of G-d and the Cosmos.
"In Platonic terms, astrology affirms the existence of an anima mundi informing the cosmos, a world soul in which the human psyche participates as a microcosm of the whole."
-- Richard Tarnas
Cosmos and Psyche
advertisements
"If the study of astrology and its deeper meanings can provide anything, it is a real confidence in one's authentic self, thus encouraging the ability to relax into an acceptance of one's true nature."
-- Stephen Arroyo
Person-to-Person Astrology
Well Neptune Cafe is jumping and mentions the upcoming 5/20/2012 eclipse -I was born just after such an eclipse which one can see by my Sun conjunct the Moon's N Node-I wonder what this one is bringing. Of course I am reminded of Tom Sawyer's creator who was born when a comet was transiting and who died when the comet returned. I am full of the creepies these days struggling to come to grips with the death that has so impacted me and left me feeling stranded in the cosmos since my sister departed 4/29/2011 and left me standing alone,all the family gone before me-well the children are still here although my beautiful, creative Lisa and her daughter Krystil are gone now.
I have passed through the darkest moments that came, I believe, because I just don't like death nor thoughts of death nor evidence of the shortness of our time in the sun. I feel like I have come to a point of acceptance but even this causes me to wonder if I am not simply shrugging off the brutal fact of death and I am simply agreeing to let myself die. Time will tell.
I can no longer believe in the kind fairy tales of the Christianity I was born to-I don't see death as a going home to Heaven although I do believe that life is eternal but I am pretty sure that there is no way out ego,our id,etc go on. No I assume that G-d is something that we can not comprehend and that G-d is eternal without beginning or end-G-d is not created and so can never die, never end. This thought is sorrowful too at least to my ego.
I would I suppose have stayed in church but I always felt rejected there and not needed and so I have gone on tasting every non-lethal sin I could while reading my elders and exploring ideas of G-d and the Cosmos.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
WEDNESDAY AGAIN
I wanted to continue describing "Tommy" of my childhood who he was and how he haunted my childhood and did his part in the brooding over the little egg of self-loathing that was to in time paralyze me and ruin my life. I have not failed utterly but I have definite
ley flunked "Civics" and "Applied Sociology".
I loathed my family as much as I was achingly dependent and had a possessive,sentimental love of family. I was so embarrassed by my mother who was so loud and abrasive and didn't wear underwear, panties,and she smoked. Terrifying in ways I was afraid to even feel much less ever speak and I barely knew it before "it"bloomed into a full time psychological complex. I lacked heart and was defeated before I even had a name. The moment I thought that my mother was embarrassing I froze, was paralyzed and just gave up. To me if I didn't have mama I had nothing and the entire game was forfeited. I struggled of course to "get out", get out of the cage wherein I lied there paralyzed and defeated. I was sexually attractive and thought that this was the result of my spiritual efforts-really.
I don't know if I will write out the actual experiences or is I will put them in a non published collection. I like the idea that I am writing this to my clan so that they can see why I didn't do so well but I did try to straighten. I can see the complex in a way-it looks like a dripping piece of coal-coal covered with blood.
More tomorrow.
ley flunked "Civics" and "Applied Sociology".
I loathed my family as much as I was achingly dependent and had a possessive,sentimental love of family. I was so embarrassed by my mother who was so loud and abrasive and didn't wear underwear, panties,and she smoked. Terrifying in ways I was afraid to even feel much less ever speak and I barely knew it before "it"bloomed into a full time psychological complex. I lacked heart and was defeated before I even had a name. The moment I thought that my mother was embarrassing I froze, was paralyzed and just gave up. To me if I didn't have mama I had nothing and the entire game was forfeited. I struggled of course to "get out", get out of the cage wherein I lied there paralyzed and defeated. I was sexually attractive and thought that this was the result of my spiritual efforts-really.
I don't know if I will write out the actual experiences or is I will put them in a non published collection. I like the idea that I am writing this to my clan so that they can see why I didn't do so well but I did try to straighten. I can see the complex in a way-it looks like a dripping piece of coal-coal covered with blood.
More tomorrow.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Tuesday 9/28/2011
This is a time of challenge for me. We are already out of money. this is because Steve's job through the Dept of Rehab has not kicked in this year-the great recession hits our family-we were safe last year but doesn't appear that we will be safe this year.
Okay!! so what to do? Prayer and meditation. Trusting that we will have what we need. My biggest doubt is the millions of people who are even now wondering how they will pay for the electricity they have already used so that they can continue receiving electricity through their wires. This is the rub with the Positive Thinking movement-I need to think that I am more deserving than those who have not gotten the word. I have had this same issue with the Christianity that I was raised with. In the fifth and sixth grade we had a mad,fundamentalist, Christian missionary for a teacher and every day started with Bible study and discussion. One day I was struck by the thought of "well if Jesus never went to Africa and the Apostles never traveled there and no one no one ever told them about Jesus then would they be condemned to death because they had never accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior? The answer I received was, after a pause, YES they would have to go to Hell because someone , sometime knew about Jesus and didn't tell them so they all have to go to Hell.
Well!! overlooking the ignorance and racism in which I was raised I think one can see where I have the problem with religion all together and Positive Thinking is part of Christian religion and I balk when I consider receiving gifts that others do not have access to or they too would be receiving the same gifts. I have an issue with "being saved" and "doing well". Why me? And why not them? I know and have known that this is not because I deserve anything that others don't deserve.
Okay!! so what to do? Prayer and meditation. Trusting that we will have what we need. My biggest doubt is the millions of people who are even now wondering how they will pay for the electricity they have already used so that they can continue receiving electricity through their wires. This is the rub with the Positive Thinking movement-I need to think that I am more deserving than those who have not gotten the word. I have had this same issue with the Christianity that I was raised with. In the fifth and sixth grade we had a mad,fundamentalist, Christian missionary for a teacher and every day started with Bible study and discussion. One day I was struck by the thought of "well if Jesus never went to Africa and the Apostles never traveled there and no one no one ever told them about Jesus then would they be condemned to death because they had never accepted Jesus as their Lord and Savior? The answer I received was, after a pause, YES they would have to go to Hell because someone , sometime knew about Jesus and didn't tell them so they all have to go to Hell.
Well!! overlooking the ignorance and racism in which I was raised I think one can see where I have the problem with religion all together and Positive Thinking is part of Christian religion and I balk when I consider receiving gifts that others do not have access to or they too would be receiving the same gifts. I have an issue with "being saved" and "doing well". Why me? And why not them? I know and have known that this is not because I deserve anything that others don't deserve.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Thursday September 8/2011
Whoa!! Long time no write. I do write to my friend Cheri on the internet and sometimes to other friends such as PatC and QOP as well. Still I thought that I was writing more regularly than this board would indicate.
Yesterday I fought off all manner of spider and little thin green worms that seemed to stand up to see who was disturbing their forest in order to pick berries in order to make a berry pie and offer up my energy and creativity to the Goddess of summer in gratitude for summer which I love and for which I never fail to feel a pull at my heart as I observe more and more yellow leaves falling to the ground. My friend Cheri says that autumn is her favorite but for me it is spring which leads to summer and I love,love summer. Not so much for winter which follows autumn. I am so grateful that our land has really three seasons-spring,growing/harvest,rainy. I was born here and although I grew up in Kansas I needed to get back to the kind climate of central California.
Yesterday I fought off all manner of spider and little thin green worms that seemed to stand up to see who was disturbing their forest in order to pick berries in order to make a berry pie and offer up my energy and creativity to the Goddess of summer in gratitude for summer which I love and for which I never fail to feel a pull at my heart as I observe more and more yellow leaves falling to the ground. My friend Cheri says that autumn is her favorite but for me it is spring which leads to summer and I love,love summer. Not so much for winter which follows autumn. I am so grateful that our land has really three seasons-spring,growing/harvest,rainy. I was born here and although I grew up in Kansas I needed to get back to the kind climate of central California.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
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